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Novelty forum • View topic - Please critique

Please critique

Where artists get to show off their art.

Please critique

Postby mia_verana » Sat Jun 30, 2012 6:29 am

Can you give me some critiques?
Here is a lineart of mine a week ago, there's something weird about her ^^"
Image
And this is my latest sketch (I don't have a tablet or a mouse so it's very messy). What do you think about the side-views?
Edit: Update lineart.
Image
Last edited by mia_verana on Sat Jun 30, 2012 2:41 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: Please critique

Postby Avaible » Sat Jun 30, 2012 1:30 pm

The second image isn't shown for me for some reason, so I can't comment on that one.

On your first image. There are two points that strike me as somewhat uncomfortable when looking at her for a bit longer (mind you, I didn't notice anything strange on first glance), and those are her neck and her legs. Her neck is too long, half the length would look more natural in my eyes. I think that's because the direction her face is turned to indicates that her neck would still go on behind her chin and at the back of the neck. If I think of it that way the neck would be about as long as her face from chin to eyebrows - and while that is not impossible the neck is too thin to look natural then. So yeah, I would try either broadening the neck, and probably her shoulders in accordance, or just shorten it. On that note, either the armpits don't match with the shoulders or the shoulders are also set too high.
There's nothing wrong with her legs per se and it could just be because of how the skirt foldes, but it seems like the right leg (the one on top I mean) is put out of joint when I compare the apparent length of both upper legs. Again, this could just be because of the perspective or maybe because the skirt line going from the knee of the leg on top seems to be going downwards a bit too far.

Lastly, let me compliment you, the line art looks very nice and somehow friendly, I like it.
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Re: Please critique

Postby mia_verana » Sat Jun 30, 2012 2:41 pm

Thank you for the critique, (and also the compliment :)). I'll try to fix the mistakes.
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Re: Please critique

Postby Berwald » Tue Jul 03, 2012 2:25 pm

Hi! I can't see the second image as well.

I like your lineart! And the character is really pretty/cute. I really don't have much to add besides her neck which is too thin, in my opinion. Nothing wrong with the shoulders, as far as I can see, except for maybe the slope of it towards the base of the neck. But her hair is covering her shoulders, so I can't really tell. To me, I think her breasts are placed a bit too low. Her right leg should be placed a little higher up on her left, or placed further towards the foreground.

I hope that helps!
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Re: Please critique

Postby racoon » Wed Jul 04, 2012 3:16 pm

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Re: Please critique

Postby Avaible » Wed Jul 04, 2012 6:16 pm

Can see the second Image now. As the first line art, it looks like you know what you're doing, nothing much to comment on except it looks nice (in a really nice way :) ).
And this is probably just part of your style, but the eyes are somehow very small in contrast to the size of the head. Or maybe it's just that her hair is bulging that way making the head seem bigger than it actually is.

It's simple and clean line art with nothing to complain about. That is something worthy of honest praise in my opinion.
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Re: Please critique

Postby Soul Rokkuman » Sun Jul 08, 2012 5:37 am

I think they look ok. Just the moon on the first one is a little off, but it's easy to fix it. And it's a very good work. You don't really need a tablet to draw pictures :)
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Re: Please critique

Postby mia_verana » Sun Jul 08, 2012 11:37 pm

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Re: Please critique

Postby vanderfoo » Fri Jul 20, 2012 9:45 pm

Wow! Very nice lineart.
The hand holding the stuff though...looks kind of iffy and the other one as well actually. You should look at your own hand for reference or someone else's I think it helps a lot.
I'd do anything,
Sing songs that lovers sing,
If I could change your mind,
Am I not the loving kind?
-Girls Aloud Ftw!
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Re: Please critique

Postby Avaible » Sat Jul 21, 2012 1:30 pm

I agree, the hands need more work, but overall it's a beautiful lineart, well done and keep it up.
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